Tutoring, Good Money?

So, I've been tutoring to make some money to keep my lifestyle alive. You know, the binge drinking, the expensive dinners, and definitely the flashy cars. Yeah right.

Anyway, I took a junior college student this week. I'm helping him with Math and Physics for his A levels, which is the equivalent of the final examinations for 12th grade. I was quite scared when I got the assignment. Why? Coz I'm rusty with a lot of this math and physics. I got the assignment on Wednesday last week and the first lesson was on Sunday night.

To prepare for this assignment, I spent a lot of time just reading through and understanding all my old notes for both subjects. I didn't make it all the way through. I finished Physics and barely started Math before it was Sunday. It took much longer than I thought it would. There's a lot of material covered over both years of Junior College, and I had to do all that in 4 days. I didn't even try to solve any of the problems, but rather just went through the conceptual stuff. I was not confident of Math and was thinking maybe I should tell him that we should concentrate on Physics instead of Math on Sunday.

When Sunday came along, I was definitely kinda stressed. I was tired from the lack of sleep and extremely fun clubbing. Although I had a long nap that afternoon, I was still a little edgy. I got my parents to send me to the place so I didn't have to waste time taking the bus.

When I got there, I showed Ken (my student) my qualifications as I was supposed to and settled down to answer his questions. I was kinda jittery, mainly because it kinda sucks if I showed him all my qualifications from Stanford and couldn't answer his Math or Physics questions. Furthermore, I am charging a higher rate for my qualifications.

The first question was Math, on trigonometry. I got stuck. After some effort trying to solve it and couldn't, I asked to move on to the next question while I think about it. At that point, I was really worried. The second question was not too much better. I was definitely struggling, trying to push my brain through. I was suddenly so ready to just tell Ken that I couldn't do it and just leave. It would have pretty much been the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I didn't leave. I took a mental breath and tried to relax. After a little thinking, I got the answer. I showed Ken how to do it and tried to get him to follow along.

The next question went much smoother, and the next and the next. Suddenly, I was on a roll. Whatever he threw at me, I steamrolled through it and explained everything carefully. Ken's slightly slow in understanding, so I had some leeway in the explanation process, being able to take it slow. My brain was finally co-operating and I was feeling a lot better. We moved on from Math to Physics and things got even better. When the 2 hours was up, we arranged to have our next lesson on Tuesday night.

When I left, I heaved a sigh of relief. It was tough starting out. I'm really rusty. But somehow, my brain pulled through and I didn't embarass myself. I just needed some brain exercise, which I got after those 2 hours. It was tiring, and I was drained. But now, I know that as long as I relax a little, I can do it.

Things became much better on Tuesday. Ken called earlier to arrange for a 3 hour lesson instead of 2 hours. It would prove to be tiring as usual, but I was no longer afraid. It wasn't a breeze and I was tired after the 3 hours, because I did most of the problem solving and just explained the ideas to him. He seems really happy with my teaching, or really desperate, because from a twice a week lesson, we are arranging for 3-4 times a week, 2-3 hours every time. Now that it's getting easier for my brain, it's actually pretty good money. I can actually teach well now, just after those two lessons of warming up. So I feel pretty justified to call my rates, slightly higher than the normal tutoring rates.

Yeah! Good money rolling in for my expenditure!

Oh man! Such an amazing weekend night!

Yes, my weekend was amazing again. Sounds like the norm for me nowadays eh? Not really, I won't take things like that for granted, but Saturday night is still very vivid and sweet in my mind.

I tuitioned on Saturday and it was payday too. It felt good, even though I didn't have too much sleep the night before and had to suck it up. The kids had a lot of fun at my lesson and I was happy too. Then I went home to get changed for dinner with my JC classmates. My sister was complete burnt like a cooked lobster. She was out in the sun for 6-7 hours supporting her faculty games and she's usually pretty pale. So she looks like a lobster now. It's so funny! I'm laughing writing this and imagining how she looks.

Seeing my old JC classmates again was also really cool. Lots of them changed in little subtle ways. The ladies are mostly working and the guys either studying or in NS. We had dinner at the Sudanese Restaurant at Suntec City. We talked about the old days, the new life we are all living now. The joy I felt at seeing them again could hardly be described. I spent 2 very good years with them, being extremely close. And now, seeing them all being the best in whatever they do, enjoying and making the most out of life is also very comforting. Many of them have gone overseas to study, actually, more than half my class went either to the UK or the US. 5 in Stanford, 3 in Cornell, 1 in UMich, 1 in UT-Austin, 1 in Duke, 1 in LSE, 1 in Oxford and more. All of them enjoyed the times overseas and many would go back, to visit or even to work. So I'm not alone in feeling that! =)

Anyway, after dinner, we went to Harry's at Esplanade to drink and chat. Some of us had a jug of Sangria. And we broke into the more intellectual conversations, since the catching up was done mostly at dinner. My class has always been very intellectual, as you can infer from now. We talked about the income inequality in Singapore, the need to keep wages competitive with the region, possbility to female National Service etc. I miss a lot of these talks. It forces me to substantiate my points, consolidate my thinking, as I'm talking with the best brains in the nation. The girls are getting the frontline news about Singapore's progress, with them working in the Economic Development Board of Singapore and the Monetary Authority of Singapore, etc. Jacky is working in the Singapore Tourism Board. Yiwen plays frisbee too, but on Friday, so I might add Friday to my list of frisbee days, since I have to miss Tuesdays now.

I was tired after drinking and talking to my classmates. I wanted to go home, even though Steph from GIC had asked me to go clubbing at New Asia Bar with her and her friends. My wallet was kinda hurting at the moment, after an expensive night on Friday night and now on Saturday. But when she messaged me, I gave in, thinking that I didn't follow them to Cocolatte the week before, I should go tonight. So when class outing ended, I headed to SwissHotel at Raffles City to meet Steph, Nicole and their friends. The cover charge for New Asia is $20 bucks, and included a vodka martini. It wasn't the drinks that made the night. The company was amazing. I hadn't clubbed for a long time, and most of my Stanford friends and other friends don't club. I like to, but only with friends. So clubbing with Steph and Nicole and their Malaysian friends were really cool. The dancing was energizing, although the view of the country from the 70th storey was breath-taking. I had never seen my country from that height and doing so last night, when all the lights were out, it was really beautiful. The company, the fun, the view and the dancing was worth every bit. I talked a lot to Steph about different things, about her work, my life and lots of other things. New Asia Bar is filled with much older people. The on-going joke between us youngsters were that the music and the people there were just so much older and had no energy. There were also a lot of girls there who were out to pick up some random white guy. SPGs or Sarong Party Girls, we call them. I have no problems with that. To each their own. But it was a club filled with lots of white people, probably pretty rich, and a completely different scene from Zouk or ChinaBlack.

After clubbing comes the supper food. It was 3 in the morning, but I followed them anyway. We went to River Valley Road for food. Milo Dinosaur is great! I love it! So much milo powder and it was so sweet! The prata was pretty good too. Stpeh was bouncing off the walls with her sugar high and all the Malaysians were talking about the Malay language and whether they were getting the right vocab for castrations, circumcision, in Malay. It was a hilarious night, lots of fun. Apparently, the food in Malaysia is different from Singapore, even though it's close. The Maggi Mee Goreng in Malaysia is brown, instead of red like it is in Singapore. Steph, who is from Malaysia, thought it was horrible. Girls...

After all that fun, it was 5.30am in the morning. We all went to crash at Steph's and Nicole's place. I figured that was the best way, because I had to get to church in the morning and I knew that if I went home to sleep, I'm NOT getting up for church. So, after 4 hours of sleep, Steph and I, along with Jeremy and Desmond went to ARPC. Church was good and the series was talking about Revelations. Then there was lunch at the Adam Road Food Center. There, we bumped into Nikki Mok, and I bumped into Ester Teo, whom I haven't seen for some time since we met at San Francisco. Ester is also a GIC scholar and was working there for 6 months before coming back here.

I went home to get some sleep, actually a lot of sleep. I needed it because of tuition later at night. How tuition went, I'll leave it up to the next entry. This entry is long enough. But just to wrap up, it was just such a great and amazing night. It reminds me how nice it is to be young and energetic, and how nice it is to have so many different groups of friends that enrich your life to no end. Praise the Lord.

The week that past

As those of you might have realised, my posts have been getting more infrequent. Not through neglect, but things have been settling down more into a routine and new things pop up less often. Every day of the week, I know pretty much what to do.

Monday: Chill after a weekend of fun. Read. Play Defense of the Ancients (Warcraft 3)
Tuesday: Play ultimate frisbee at Riverside. Might include a dinner with friends after that.
Wednesday: Play ultimate frisbee at National University of Singapore. Definitely includes dinner with friends.
Thursday: May play ultimate frisbee at Riverside, depending on whether I'm up to it. Dinner with friends or alone. Dancing at Jitterbugs after dinner. Drinks after? Maybe.
Friday: Party night. Chill the day away, plan for dinner, and partying. General drunkedness.
Saturday: Tuition for the Sim kids. 3 hours in the morning or afternoon. Beach maybe, or just planning some get-together with old or new friends.
Sunday: Church in the morning. Now, I have tuition on Sunday nights. There would be another tuition during the weekdays, just not sure what time we're settling on yet.

That's about it. Not too much change nowadays. The only change is the people I meet, new or old, the slight differences in each time I play ultimate and the movies I watch.

Watched "Mob Sister" with Clement on Wednesday. It was a nice movie, but we weren't really in the mood for a chinese mob story that was very heartfelt and beautiful. We were expecting some fighting, some taking over of gangs etc. Instead, we had a young 18 year old who refused to see her "uncles" fight over the gang land and sacrificed herself for her beliefs. It was quite a beautiful movie, although a bit cheesy.

Yesterday was a very tiring day. Went to RJC to apply for a relief teaching position. Decided that since I have another 6 weeks as a civilian, I might as well go teach the younger ones something. I like old school anyway, and it'll be nice to teach for a while.

Then I spent 2 hours going through my old JC physics notes. I'm tutoring this kid who is going to take his A levels in 2 months and I have to know the stuff better than he does before I can tutor. I'm rusty in some of the concepts, so I have to brush that up.

After that, I headed down to Riverside for frisbee. It was another tiring running around. Although this time, I actually managed to make better cuts and better throws. I scored a few times, both throwing the disc and catching it in the end zone. After reading the book, Ultimate, and playing it every week, I'm getting a good hang of it. Still a long way to go, but it's a start. I might play in the Singapore Open with a team that needs people. But I'm still not sure about that yet. Hmmm.

Dinner followed frisbee. I was starving. I need a lot of food to keep my stomach happy. And I didn't eat too much lunch. After dinner was dancing. Seiwei and Stephanie Tan (not Seiwei's gf Steph) were there too. Steph Tan is new to dancing, so we taught her how to do the lindy. Dancing is still really fun. As long as I keep figuring out new moves in my head and not dance too much that it gets stale. I'm not getting any better. Just smoother and will play more with the music. I'm kinda stagnanting with taking classes. But I'm not too keen on doing that at the moment. Maybe later on, I'll do that again. Met Gracie dancing. She works as an advertiser. She knew Seiwei way back when they first started dancing. She's starting dancing again. Seiwei, Steph, Gracie and I went for a drink after dancing. Gracie and I were talking about Singapore's globalization and letting the younger people meet up with people from other countries. Our topic also involved a lot of how Singapore needs to look outwards through its people building relationships with foreign counterparts, either by having exchange programs with them, or going overseas. We'll be continuing to talk about this next week.

After that, we went home. The bus service stopped already. So instead of taking a cab (saving money), I walked home. It took me 50 minutes to get home. It isn't a long way, just from one end of a highway to the other and I have done it many times. I was just really tired after running around all day and dancing. It was kinda fun though. Haven't walked that road for a while. It passes through where I canoed for 2 years. I took a while to reminescine about the days of canoeing when we were crazy and had to train the whole day, doing lots of pushups and chinups. The pain and the glory. When I finally got home, it was a hot shower and then Dota before dropping my tired body into bed.

A pretty good day. I'm still continuously meeting new people that pop out of nowhere. I'm kinda making a huge effort to be friendly and meet lots of people. And it's definitely paying off well. I'm averaging 1-2 new people every week. The good thing is also that I still meet up with these people every week, therefore improving relationships. Like they say, "There's no such thing as a business relationship. It's always a personal relationship." The more people I am friends with, the better it is for life in general and even business.

However, I have yet to meet up with one of my oldest friends since I came back to Singapore. I need to set something up with him to meet him again. We have been friends since we were 3 and although our paths have been different in life, our history keeps us together. Time to figure out what he's up to.

What do I talk about?

Well, it's been some time since my last entry. I figured I should do some writing.

This Friday was Chris' birthday dinner celebration. We (the Stanford bunch + Frankie) went to some Noodle Bar at Millenia Walk. It was pretty good Szechuan noodles. We then went to Boat Quay for drinks. Okay, some really funny things that night.

1) The bar was kinda horrible. It's called Queenz. And there's this small font that says, "Since 2005". Is it since 2005 B.C? or A.D?

2) The guys played a drinking finger guessing game. Chee Hau was playing with Jason. Of course, if you lose, you drink. Jason was drinking a mixed drink and Chee Hau? Sprite. Jason kept playing with him. He didn't know why he kept losing.

3) Eating satay at Lao Pa Sat. I was sitting opposite Shuzhen and Jason was opposite Chris.
Me: I wonder where all the cute girls at Singapore hang out.
Chris (to Jason more than me): There's one opposite you.
Jason (Bursts out laughing): Chris, you're opposite me and you're not cute.

4) Highlight of the night. In Shuzhen's car.
Chris: Shuzhen, I'm not interested in you. What do you feel about that?
Shuzhen (VERY happily): I'm so ecstatic.
Rest of car(Jason and me): HAHAHAHA!

Sunday was the Stanford Gathering at Dexian's place. Not bad, gotta see some of the old people again, and the new people going to Stanford. I think some of them look extremely dorky. =) I know that's mean, but nah.

Taking the bus back, I passed by two places in Singapore which are very unique in some way. Little India and Geylang. I have always remarked that Geylang is one place in Singapore that still looks like a 3rd world country. Little India is definitely another place like that. Being Sunday, there were HORDES of Indians just on the streets walking and hanging out. It's kinda creepy seeing so many Indians in one place. It definitely reminds me of my 4 weeks in India. They were just chilling, mingling around and being on the streets. I know I'm kinda racist against Indians, especially after my trip to India, even though I try hard to put that out of my mind. Little India is definitely the manifestation of India in Singapore. But it's a lot cleaner, a lot safer. I think because I'm either used to being in crowded places with lots of Asians, or with lots of white people, being in a crowded place with lots of Indians or Black people kinda scare me, or make me uneasy. However, one thing I am happy about is the way the sterilization of Singapore hasn't make this place lose its charm. I would be very appalled to see Little India turn into the Chinatown now. Oooh, euuuuuhhh...

Screwups with CMPB

So, CMPB will get my vote for most inefficient organization EVER. Why? Coz I got screwed over by the inefficiency. As many of you know, I've to go back into National Service. To do so, I need to have a medical status, so that I can be posted to the right department. I had my medical checkup the week I was back in Singapore, early July, probably the 13th or 14th. They said that they will need my medical records from the Singapore General Hospital, because of a training injury sustained 4 years ago. So, they gave me 3 months of PES D, a temporary, useless medical status, meaning that I still cannot enlist. CMPB said that they will request my medical records from SGH and give me a PES status. The medical records will usually take 3 weeks.

I went back for another medical checkup on my eyesight on the 28th of July. I asked them about the medical records. It wasn't in from SGH yet. Since it has only been 2 weeks then, I wasn't too worried.

Time past. Lots of time. And nothing has happened. So I gave a call to the PES status office for re-enlistees last week, the 12th of August. So, that's 4 weeks already. And they told me that the records was still not in from SGH! Wow. Ok, that really sucks. The person manning the desk said that he'll check through and help me with moving things along.

Today, 18th of August. I get a call at 9.30 in the morning from the PES status office. They told me that SGH does not have my medical records from 4 years ago. I was like, "WTF mate!" That's not possible. The guy gave me the SGH number and I called SGH. The lady who picked up gave it a check, and they HAVE my records. And she asked me when did CMPB ask for the records. I said, probably around 4 weeks ago. And do you know what the answer was? "There was no request from CMPB about your medical records!" SONAVABITCH!! So CMPB was the one that didn't send in the request! And they tried covering it up saying that SGH didn't have my records?

So I called CMPB back. And told them what SGH said. They checked it and told me that the request went out 2 weeks ago. I don't know what the f*** is happening. The guy at CMPB spoke to SGH immediately and requested for my files. And it will take 2 long weeks to get my records from SGH to CMPB, because it is in microfilm.

At this point, I was fuming mad. Instead of putting in the request for my records early, it took CMPB 3 weeks to put the request in. And nothing happened for another 2 weeks. Now, I have to wait for another 2 weeks for the records to get to CMPB, another week or so for my medical status to be determined, probably another 3-4 weeks before I will enlist. That makes the entire thing 12 weeks long. 3 f***ing months! I didn't ask for this! I didn't ask for time to be sitting on my ass for 3 long months, when I can be serving out this stupid National Service and then getting it over with! I can't bitch enough. How much of my time must CMPB waste? It is completely inefficient.

But, I didn't blow up in their face. I just told them to keep me posted on the medical records thing. I'll be calling them early next week to check up on them. And call them every two days to make sure things are moving. You know what? This reminds me of John Stockdale. Nothing moves. My blood is boiling when I write this. My aim? To be out of National Service before my 25th birthday on August 3rd 2007. Damn that stupid CMPB.

Short update on life

Haven't been doing too much lately, since that "fantastic day". Just been staying at home, reading and putting together my Freedom Gundam model that my Stanford friends got me for my bday. It's not done yet, basically coz I'm taking my time, doing a little, then doing something else. This is mostly what's happening to me during the early days of a week. Sunday and Monday are really chill days. Nothing to do. Time is spent reading or just playing computer games or watching movies on my computer. Tuesday onwards is more exciting. Frisbee goes on on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. That takes up lots of my energy and time, both the game and the hanging out after that.

Met up with old friends again on Tuesday. Phinehas and Zhongwen, both 2 years and 1 year older than me, from RJC. I know Phinehas through dance and Zhongwen through Mark Lim and the other older canoeists. They were playing frisbee too on Tuesday. After frisbee, we went to Cafe Iguana for Margaritas. It's half price before 9pm, and half price from midnight till close. So, we paid only $15 for 2 jugs of Margaritas and tortilla chips. That's cheap for Singapore. Then I went to watch Bewitched with Joanne. It's not such a good movie. Parts of it was kinda boring, and there wasn't any real climax and anything particularly striking about the movie. So, it was just an eye-candy for 2 hours.

Today was frisbee again. Jason came to play too, even with his "broken knee". Met Fengyuan too. So it's really cool to see old friends again in a new situation, where we all share the same interest. Dinner was as usual, with the frisbee people at Holland Village.

Joyce shared an interesting fact about her brother's, Seiwei's, GIC friends. That she didn't really like them from the interacting at Steph's farewell party. She thought that the GIC scholars seem pretty pretentious and lived in another world. So, she said that she wouldn't ever think of hanging out with them, even if her brother was there. Hmm. I'm more at ease with people of nearly all backgrounds, so I don't have the same concerns as her. But it's an interesting thought about how the normal Singaporeans view the "scholars" and those that have gone overseas. Often with some sort of contempt, that the scholars are so pampered, or that they are just "inhuman" (Meaning that they have done things that are way above normal understanding).

I am a pretty arrogant person too, very prideful about my accomplishments. I know I rub off people the wrong way sometimes. But I am very sure that most scholars want to be part of the system again. They don't want to be different, or seen as completely different from the others. The scholars are here to serve the nation for everyone! Granted that a lot of our mannerisms come from where we were the past years (people change, you know!), we aren't malicious or condescending of people. Respect for everyone is still important. I would be just as pissed off with scholars being condescending of others. But, yeah, some scholars just rub off on others the wrong way. It's a tight rope to walk, between blending in and being different.

One fantastic day

So, what does it mean for me to have a fantastic day? Yesterday was a fantastic day.

I woke up early to tutor math and science to two kids. That my main source of income now, paying me $30 and hour. So, that took around 3 hours, plus transport to and fro, plus talking to the mom about her kids' progress. The time will be lengthened to 4 hours, making it $120 everytime I go to their place to tutor for 4 hours. Not bad, as that will be better than my allowance in the army.

After that, I headed home to change into beachwear. Seiwei and his friends from GIC (Government Investment Corporation of Singapore) were going to Siloso Beach in Sentosa for the afternoon till the night. He asked to come along, and I said, "Of course!" So, after changing, I left for Sentosa, getting picked up outside Harbourfront, then straight to the beach. The weather was amazing, bright, sunny and hot, just the way you like weather to be. They had packed sandwiches and a bunch of other titbits to eat. We found a spot behind some large rocks and under some trees for shade. It was such a chill afternoon, swimming, chatting, singing songs to the guitar, reading and playing frisbee.

I got to meet new friends. Desmond, I already knew from Steph's farewell party. I also met another Steph (law student from Cambridge), Jeremy (finance student from Penn), Nicole (another college student), and Jinn. All of them are current scholars or working with GIC. It was really fun getting to know all of them, talking about our experiences overseas, what we were doing now, and what we figured would be in tune for us in the future. The girls were all really cute. No arguments about that. Jinn was actually from RJC, S02A, 2 years before I was. Her CT was also Ms Lim Puay Miao, and it was funny talking about our times in RJC. The other 4 were Malaysians, and had very different experiences from Seiwei and me, although Jeremy was in RJC 1 year after me, in S01. He know David Han, and Justin, both canoeists like me. After hanging out at the beach, we all took a walk just as the sun was setting, to KM8, a club at Tanjong Beach. It was quite far down along the beach from Siloso Beach, but it didn't feel long at all, since we were all young and excited about having spent a chill day at the beach.

At KM8, we ordered drinks and sat around to talk. I remembered Steph talking about not having any roots in Singapore, unlike the other few Malaysians, and was wondering how to meet other friends in Singapore rather than just workmates. I told her about my own fears of not being able to meet people either, although those fears have been pushed back very fast, now that I've been very active meeting people at activities. We had some fruity cocktail drink in a jug. It was pretty good, except that there was so much ice in the jug that there wasn't much alcohol at all. There was a jacuzzi there, but they only allowed "Ladies or Couples" to use it. So when Steph and Seiwei went into the jacuzzi, it was fine, but when Jeremy and I wanted to join in, we were denied. We had half a mind to say that we were a gay couple, but somehow, didn't.

After chatting for a long time, we got changed and went for dinner. Now, since most of these friends were Malaysian, they had never been to Geylang, and really wanted to eat chilli crab for dinner. So I took them to No Signboard Seafood outside my house in Geylang. The food was really good, and they all enjoyed themselves a lot. The white bread soaked in chilli crab sauce was amazing. Apparently, Nicole loves eating carbohydrates but looking at her good figure, you'll never realise it. Jeremy scooped up the sauce and ate it without anything, which is how good it is. After dinner, I took them on a walking tour of Geylang. They wanted to see what it is to be in the red-light district. The Malaysians commented that it was a lot like Kuala Lumpur and Penang. I agree too. Geylang has the raw, unpolished look of a 3rd world country, but also the charm of it too. It's not sterilized like most of the other parts of Singapore. Living here is kinda cool, meaning that I have food till the wee hours of the morning.

After the walk, Seiwei took them home, and my day ended. Not before we decided that we were going to go roller-blading next week and hang out again. It was a fantastic day. Good, chill activities at the beach. Great new friends, new experiences to share. Good food and dinner. Good conversations. Exciting, relaxing day. I couldn't have asked for a better way to spend Saturday. I love meeting new people, who love to share in what they do. I think the GIC scholars are all really cool people. And the fact that the Malaysians have a different growing up experience from me makes it all the more exciting. Friends make all the difference in life!

Tuition

So, I found out what happened for tuition. Apparently, my student terminated my service with the agency. The agency asked him to contact me about it too, but he didn't, therefore the wasted trip. The reason for termination? He wanted model answers for A level essays, but I could only provide model answers for Prelim essays. So bullshit isn't it? Basically, he photocopied all the essays and notes that he needed from me, and then said goodbye. The agency took his reason, but I don't buy it at all. Whatever, I just need my notes and the essays back from him. I'm pissed that such people have no sense of responsibility in terms of informing people when not to meet, or when you have already stopped the service. Man, makes my blood boil sometimes. Now, he's not returning my calls, because I think he's afraid to see me. Serangoon Junior College...sigh. I'm so tempted to make a snipe at the type of people some of these JCs churn out, but I won't.

Stanford Talk at RJC and Problems at Tutoring

Went back to RJC today to give a talk to the students about Stanford. Went pretty well, with Jason, Joan and Scott (Phi Psi brother). The kids are getting more and more shy. No one really asks questions anymore. They talk among themselves, laugh and joke a little, but none are really confident about asking questions about the school, or life overseas. Hmmm, I think that it's high time Singapore school kids become more outspoken, less self conscious. I suppose I can't really blame them. I am still pretty self conscious, but the States has made me speak out more and more. Anyway, I think it all went well, with a few kids staying back to ask us questions. Most of them wanted to know about the admissions criteria, and a little about the life there. Telling them about it gives me pangs :) I know how much I want to be back there.

Tuition was a disaster. Why? My student wasn't home. I spent an hour getting to his house, and he was out. According to his mom, he's out with friends. I was pissed. The next time this happens, I'm going to have to charge him for transport fees and time lost. He'll probably move the tuition to tomorrow. I need to prepare for Saturday's tuition. Sigh. Kids nowadays, no sense of responsibility.

Frisbee and thoughts on differences

The frisbee game today went pretty well. I learnt a lot again. I was really tired, mainly because I'm still so unfit. One of the person quoted me this. "A veteran player once said, 'You get fit to play frisbee, not play frisbee to get fit.'" I'm doing the latter, because that's what I'm trying to do, get fit. Once I get better and better at playing, it'll probably end up being the former. I met more people, like Raphael who helped explain more strategy and playing techniques to me. I need to work on my throwing. It REALLY sucks. Then there's Edgar, I think, who commented that his sister went to Stanford too, 10 years before I did. Met Nick again, who plays at the Muddy Grass pickup too. And more people. Looks like I'll probably add Tuesday to my list of pickup games to go to.

Many of the people there asked me whether I was local. I have been getting that question a lot. Not surprising, considering I don't try to fit in, I just do whatever I feel like doing. I still speak differently, think differently, dress differently. I feel good being different.

When I was younger, I was afraid to be different, and wanted to fit in. I didn't fit in, and felt bad because of it, being teased a lot about being different and not part of a group. Now, after being to Stanford, I no longer care too much about fitting in. The Bay Area, Stanford and Phi Psi celebrates differences just as much as similarities. When you're different, your skills are different, and you can contribute in different ways. Different people make life more interesting. If everyone does the same thing, how boring is that? Once you have a basic similarity with some people, look for how they differ from you. Learn from it, enjoy it, that they have different hobbies. Let them show it to you, show you their world. Then show them your world, and let them learn from it too. It's amazing. I'm going to try to see Singapore through my own eyes, the eyes of the true blue Singaporeans who play frisbee, and also through the eyes of the foreigners too.

I'm not saying that I don't enjoy being similar to people. My closest friends, like David, Jason, Schwartz, Danger, Guohao, Danny, etc, all have similar traits to me. I enjoy being able to share time with them, doing things we all enjoy. But they also think differently from me. David is extremely meticulous and a born leader, Jason way better at adminstrative and organization than I am, Schwartz being able to manipulate a computer better than I can dance, Danger being the literary guy, Guohao being the medical person and Danny the amazing baseball player. So different, yet the same values in many ways. All good friends and people I call brothers.

What did Phi Psi teach me? We come from all over the world, and believe different things. But we are all brothers, a common bond of fraternity, gentlemenly values, and responsibility to each other. We argue a lot about our differences, and our differences have led us to lots of arguments. But we learn from all these things and that's what's amazing about it. Our differences and our willingness to embrace them.

So, in conclusion, I'm happy to be different. Not just another person in the works, but uniquely different. Yeah!!!

National Day

Today's Singapore's 40th birthday. 40 years since independence. Something to be proud of. A small nation like us, surviving and flourishing for 40 years. It hasn't been easy. So many things could go wrong, but the nation as a whole has pulled through. Lots of thanks to the wise leaders we have and all those who gave their blood, sweat, toil and tears for the land.

I didn't watch the parade. I was playing ultimate frisbee at Clarke Quay. However, it had a great view of the fly-bys of the F-16s, the commandos doing their parachuting and the National flag flown across the sky underneath a Chinook. We would stop the game to watch the aerial shows. There's always this tinge and a shiver of pride running through my body, to see how everyone is so enthusiastic about the country's birthday and how proud it is to be a Singaporean. Even though most of the time, I complain wanting to be elsewhere, that Singapore is too stifling, August 9th is always a time when I feel that I have something to be proud of, being Singaporean, even a crazy, studious, not too well blended in Singaporean. Same tinge happened when I saw the tanks and other vehicles drive by when I was walking to City Hall. The soldiers were waving at the passerbys, who all waved back and there was festivity and pride in the air. Even though I know it's just the occasion, and not necessarily how people usually feel, it's nice to get the tinge of pride once in a while.

Celebrations of all kinds

Well, so I went out with some of my close friends to celebrate my birthday on Saturday. Just some of the Stanford people, plus Joanne from dance. We arranged to meet at 6.30pm at City Hall, and going to Suntec to eat. We ended up eating at an international buffet at Suntec City Convention Center, because some of the guys wanted buffets. You can guess how large their appetite are. The decor was really nice and cosy. We were initially seated at a large 10 person table, but there were this cosy cushioned counters, with the sofas on three sides, and opened only on one side. It seems to fit around 6 people, but being crazy Stanford students, we somehow decided that it'll be fun to all squeeze in tight around this small, cosy looking counter. So we did. It wasn't too tight, with still enough space, although we needed to clear our plate pretty quickly to make space for everyone's food. The food was not too bad, but not impressive. The dessert, however, was actually much more interesting, and way better. Durian cream puffs, with real durian paste, kuah lapis (Thousand Layer Cake), lots of fresh fruits, and chocolate cake made a good round up for the dinner.

Shuzhen has her birthday one day after mine, 4th of August, so it was kinda like a double celebration. The guys got her a pair of earrings while they got me a Gundam Seed model of Freedom Gundam. I always wanted one, but was always too cheap to get myself one. But somehow, they made a gamble that I'll like it and bought it for me. It was definitely a good gift. I'm going to put it together and paint it sometime this weekend. We spent most of dinner catching up with the latest news and gossip, and talking about old times. After dinner, some of the people left for other parties, leaving Shuzhen, Zhihao, Jason, Hon Mun, Chris and me. We wanted to go get some coffee, but the entire Marina area was packed because of National Day rehearsals. Everyone was there, and there was no space to sit to get coffee. We ended up sitting at the Esplanade, talking and chatting, before leaving around 11pm.

Oh, the air-conditioning there is amazing. Very cold and very soothing. Have to try it out.

Today, had dinner with Tanya at Crystal Jade at Suntec. She just started work at IDA, which is located at Suntec Tower Three. She's been ill for the past weeks, with dengue fever and other stuff. What a way for Singapore to receive her after being away for so long. We chatted about her job, what I was doing, how she felt being back and what plans she had for the future. Many unknowns, which we'll take strides to solve. She then went to watch "Bewitched" with Harold, while I left for Marina Bay to meet up with the other Stanford guys.

Why the Stanford guys again? Coz we were going to Marina Bay to do the countdown for Singapore's 40th birthday. There were lots of fireworks, different singers performing on stage for a huge crowd. The singers were like Tanya Chua, 183 Club, and some other up and coming Taiwanese pop stars, along with the winner of Singapore Idol. The guest of honor was PM Lee Hsien Loong, and Minister of Defence Teo Chee Hien. We stood around, listening to the performances and waiting for the fireworks. The fireworks were okay, choreographed to old National Day celebration songs played by the Singapore Chinese Orchestra. It wasn't very impressive, given that no one really cares about how well it fits with the music, but rather how bright and varied the fireworks are. So, for most of the 15 minutes which the fireworks went on, it was rather boring, and only at 2 points in the middle and the last finale part which was pretty impressive. I've seen so many firework displays that it has to be at least a dazzling sight in order for it to be anywhere close to good.

After the fireworks, everyone started leaving, so we went out for porridge in Chinatown. We'll be watching more fireworks tomorrow, but not before I get another game of ultimate frisbee pickup at Clarke Quay.

Take my breath away!

Was talking to AJ about his long hike to Thunderbolt Peak. It took him over 28 hours to do the entire climb. He showed me some of his pictures over the internet. Let's just say, the view was breath-taking. Sitting on top of the mountain, over 14000 ft, looking at the world around you, at your feet. I can hardly describe how I feel, looking at a picture of something like that, knowing that a brother has climbed it and has been there. I am happy for him, that he's living life fully. And of course, I'm envious.

I miss getting my breath taken away. Getting blown away by magnificent scenes, after tiring long climbs. I miss seeing new and beautiful places. I remember the sights that I saw when I went mountain biking with David off Skyline Boulevard. All these beautiful sights and scenes. Here in Singapore? None. Maybe coz I've been here in the concrete jungle for too long. This place is just too familiar. There is nothing here that can blow me away like anything else I've seen back at the States. Some places come close. Like the area behind the Esplanade, next to the river and looking at the skyline of Raffles Place. Like the sight from a tower at Macritchie Reservoir, looking out at the reservoir and the trees around. Close, but not quite.

Nearly everything now leaves an itch in me. An itch to be free again. To meet the crazy brothers and friends I have, who will bring me to do things that they are passionate about, and will share with others. With David, it's mountain biking, archery. AJ, climbing. Schwartz, water-skiing. Other guys, sports. It makes life so much more fulfilling. I am willing to do anything and everything, but often don't have a clue, or just have too much inertia to move on it.

But with friends. The best friends take me out of my comfort zone, put me somewhere I am willing to challenge myself, physically and mentally. Only with friends like that, will life always be exciting and on the edge. I want to maintain that itch, because it'll keep me on my toes, so that I will always be ready for my next challenge. Frisbee is my current challenge. I'll let that take me as far as I can go. Then I'll be ready for the next one in line.

Birthday!

Well, it's my birthday today. My 23rd. Wow, somehow, that's a scary thought. 23, and not even working yet, going into NS, so much of life not done or experienced. Yes, I know 23 is really young. I feel young and energetic, knowing that there's a long life ahead of me. But I look back at my life and it's been a really fast 23 years. I did a lot, but... somehow I don't think I did enough. Why not? I spent nearly all my time being involved in activities, school, friends, brotherhood, and so mcuh more. Lots of people envy the life I have had and would give lots to have it now. It's not that I'm not satisfied with life. It's just that in my personality, I just can't be satisfied. I'm not satisfied with my life now, not satisfied with being here, with nearly every aspect of my life. I always want to find more, do more, be involved in more. I want more and more out of life. Maybe that's a good thing. We only have a limited time in life. We need to squeeze as much out of it as possible.

Other things that happened today. Went to see the lawyer with my parents to resolve an issue with our neighbour. They are suing us for encroachment of our wall. Stupid neighbours. We built the wall as a common wall, for both of our families, and the father of the neighbours agreed to it 20 years ago when the wall was built. Now, the father passed away and the sons want us to tear the wall down because it is 3 inches on their land. Since it's a common wall, the wall should straddle both sides anyway. The court might dismiss the case just because it's so trivial and they will have to pay our lawyer fees. Sigh, hopefully things go right.

Played pickup ultimate frisbee today. Very tired again, running like a stupid maniac. But I'm getting the hang of the game, being able to cut and move in the right directions and formations. Making the right decisions. I still need to work on more gameplay and ESPECIALLY my throwing. Unless I can throw more accurately, I'm kinda screwing my team. Oh, and I bought cleats, which actually means that I can stop and change direction, rather than just get caught flat footed.

Ahhh, more tutoring for the rest of the week to get some more money!

And thanks for all those people that SMS or IMed me to wish me Happy Birthday!